Dont drink the water

As some of you know, I recently went on vacation to Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic. It was absolutely gorgeous there. I had a fabulous time. J and I laughed it up and enjoyed the pool bar ( a little too much)

For anyone traveling there, one word of advice. DON'T DRINK THE WATER. EVER.

This sounds simple enough, right? Except they pour you water every time you turn around. And quite frankly, there are only so many Amaretto on the rocks and Vodka tonics one can drink without wanting for example, to throw up in the pool. Hydration is key. Bring Gatorade in your checked luggage. Im not kidding.

Id just tell you to drink bottled water. But F that. It isnt that simple. I learned that cruel lesson in Puerto Rico. I had just returned home from Punta Cana, and was recovering from some awful, wretched infestation from the water. (E Coli they think. ) I had to travel to Puerto Rico for business, and decided to only drink bottled water. Good choice right?

No.

The bottled water provided by the hotel was bottled in Puerto Rico at some nice, natural,E coli infested spring.

Greeeeeeaaaat. Just great.

And to you people that swear you can drink the water in Puerto Rico, I brought a bottle back in my suitcase. Ill pour you a nice glass of it. Bottoms up, and enjoy--cause soon you will be a veritable spout of disgustingness and misery.

So we are clear, I wasn't the only one that became sick in Puerto Rico. B also became sick. It hit her first. I thought to myself, hmm. I wonder. Sure enough, later that night..it hit me.

Here are tips I recommend to you when traveling to the Caribbean:

Hot Tip # 101
If you are on a tropical island, you should drink bottled water. That being said, please ensure the bottled water you are drinking does NOT come from a DEEP NATURAL WELL from said island you are visiting. It is best if the water is imported from somewhere like Iceland. Or Antarctica. Bring water with you in your CHECKED luggage. Also, remember to avoid ice in drinks. If you don’t, both you and your travel partner will want to die, or presume you are going to.

Hot Tip # 102
You can throw up long after you would swear you are finished.

Hot Tip # 103
E coli makes some things precarious. Like sneezing. If I have to explain, you need to go look up what E coli can do to your system.

Hot Tip # 104
Perhaps when traveling to said islands, drink only products bottled by Coca Cola. But not by a Coca Cola bottling plant on said island.

Hot Tip # 105
Because we cannot be sure it IS just the water and not the food. Be careful. B is recommending a diet of Sprite and Snickers. I vote no food. Gatorade and Sprite or Vodka. That's it. And if you must eat, for the love of God, avoid salad or fruit. Salad and fruit, if you're lucky is washed. But remember, it is washed with water from the island. Makes you hungry doesn't it?